having a condition.

I have a condition, a health condition. I’m half deaf or three quarters deaf, I only have half of the hearing on my right side, and that’s it! The left side only has 15% hearing which is good for sounds only and it usually only mess up my head since I can not identify them.

I was not born like this, I got diagnosed with bilateral cholesteatoma when I was 2 years and half, between 2.5-5 years I spent time between hospitals and doctors, got 7 surgeries done and ta-da! no more cancer :)! of course after that came the living with it part, which it implied a lot of carings specially for a little girl, so I got a hearing aid for my right ear to improve my hearing at school and life, and wax ear plugs for watery related things, I was forbidden to swim, sink, or get close to water enough to put me in danger, so I never took swimming lessons, sinking underwater usually was followed by Mum scolding me and a very bad ear infection, resulting into a horrible sick week. Because of the many ear infections I used to and still get I’ve learned to identify most of ’em and their origin, also because of them I developed a very high tolerance to pain (ear infections are so freaking painful!), also my stability is not precisely accurate but when I was in ballet I was great so I have always done my best!. I was raised and treated as a normal kid with “special carings” that may be good and bad at same time for since I wasn’t treated different I learned to try my best to be “normal” I demanded my self to pay more attention in order to read people’s lip and to try to focus better in what they say so they don’t notice my “condition”, but to be honest it’s exhausting and plain wrong! There’s nothing I can actually do about it you know? I can’t help it, I didn’t chose it, it just happened. Why? Only God knows why and I’m ok with it, yeah sure sometimes it bothers me because the whole world works to listen and to see, and now thank God people are more aware of blind people so slowly they are starting to have their “independency”


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